Title: Pichi Pichi Pitch Volume(s): 6 Creator(s): Pink Hanamori, Michiko Yokote Format: Unflipped; Right-to-Left Publisher: Del Rey MSRP: $10.95 Genre(s): Comedy Rated: Teen (13+)

Man oh man, sometimes I can't help but marvel at how I get myself into situations where I end up reading a series like "Pichi Pichi Pitch." Somebody explain to me how this book managed to find it's way into my lap, because I sure as heck don't remember. I'm trying to remember whether I walked into a book store completely drunk, or whether I lost a bet that resulted in me buying this book (since I don't drink, I think I'm going to have to assume the latter). At Comic Con the editors of Del Rey gushed about this series at their Q&A panel (like they do all the series they want to sell there), saying that this was a really cute series that anyone could enjoy, and that almost everyone who read it were going to like it. Um, no, I'm sorry, but they're not. In fact, I'm going to venture that the only people who will like "Pichi Pichi Pitch" are little girls under the age of five, either because they like simple stories, or because they won't be able to read, thus making following the story impossible. From what I've read, "Pichi Pichi Pitch" revolves around two mermaids that run a bath house (don't even think about what I know your thinking of), and they look like normally humans until they get into the water and turn into humans (I said don't think about it).

A dramatic moment in "Pichi Pichi Pitch."

The girls are named Pink Hanamori (the star of the series), and her sister Nikora. If you couldn't figure out from the description above, these two girls are mermaids. And not just any mermaids mind you, but princesses of a world in the ocean. So what are they doing in the real world? Well, they are looking for a magical pearl that protects their kingdom. From the way the story goes, the girls lost the pearl and now have to find it before an evil force that wants to destroy the marine world does, which explains how the girls manage to open up a bathhouse and have time to lounge around in it all day long. The story gets more tedious...I mean, complicated, when Pink falls in love with a surfer boy named Kaito, who has the looks of a "Dawson's Creek" character and the personality of a wet rag. Nikora, as well as the girls older, wiser, and smarter mentor, Hippo (who for some unexplainable reason happens to be a penguin), warn Pink not to fall in love, because they are too busy trying to save the world to have time for love, though you wouldn't know this from actually READING the book, which shows the characters taking baths, going to school, singing, swimming in the ocean, dreaming of boys, and telling their sage penguin not to worry whenever he gets on their case for being completely lazy and worthless couch potatoes! At one point in the story, the "enemy" attacks the girls, and they transform into powerful warriors using Sailor Moon style transformations, and what do they do to fight the "enemy?"

In case you couldn't figure out, this is the love interest.

Well, if you thought swords, guns, or magical gay pink batons, then you thought wrong. No, they sing. They sing, sing, and sing to defeat their enemies. Please tell me the publisher is not seriously trying to sell this sort of book to teenagers. Or adults. Or anyone who is NOT a five year old girl! Not to make it sound like I'm attacking young girls or anything, but this sort of thing is a lot like Barbie in more ways then one. It's innocent, naive, the "action" is never over-the-top, and fun if you are a young dreamer who has this ideal view of what love and life should be like, but try to take it even the slightest bit seriously, and the whole series falls apart. Heck, it doesn't just fall apart, it crumbles into dust and couldn’t even be re-built if you sucked it up with a vacuum cleaner. As you can tell from the scans, the artwork is simple to the point of being bland. Big eyes, cute hair, and simple costumes prove to be very under-whelming to look at. The artwork is so cute I think I got some cavities while reading this book. The backgrounds are not really all that detailed, nor is the action that takes place during the series most "thrilling" moments. The character interaction is extremely shallow and tedious, as these characters will talk for pages without having anything important or interesting to say. And the main character goes from turning into a mermaid and a human so fast and so frequently, that I'm surprised she doesn't get whiplash. Darn, I've already described the whole series, and I'm still a paragraph and a half short of a full review. How on Earth am I going to stretch this review out any further? Oh, I know, how about the fact that not one, but TWO people worked on this book!

A concert for the ages...I think

One person wrote the story to this, and the other person drew the series. Needless to say, this is either the most poorly coupled creative pairs ever put together, or one of the most logical pairs, seeing as how the writer can't write, and the artist is a mediocre drawer. Whoever put these two together in a room and asked them to create a comic should really get an Eisner or something. I'm not sure what they were trying to prove, but I see TONS of comics, sketches, and story ideas from fans almost every week. Some of the stuff is brilliant, and I can't believe that these people don't have jobs in the comics industry for one reason or another. Now sometimes I understand that while some person may have a good idea for a series, the idea doesn't really fly when they attempt to flesh it out, and sometimes there may be a great artist who can draw great characters, but might have very bland backgrounds. All this I understand, and I know you need multiple skills if you're going to make it in this industry (or at the very least you need a team of people who can do what the other person can't). But then you have a series like "Pichi Pichi Pitch," something that was deemed good enough to actually publish, and I can't help but wonder what they passed on before they decided on this series to publish. Both the Japanese publisher AND Del Rey! Were the Japanese publishers REALLY convinced that this was their next hot property, or did they desperately need a series to fill a gap in a manga anthology?! Since I know the editors of Del Rey really well, I also find it strange that with all the top quality series they pick up, that they decided to pick up this one. In fact, considering that they just picked up "Basilisk," "Parasite," and the "Tsubasa" art books, it's obvious that they weren't hurting for quality books to publish, which makes their publishing of "Pichi Pichi Pitch" even more baffling.

These are the latest line of female superheros. Notice how little their skirts cover up their legs.

What's REALLY going to surprise you though is that this book is not only being marketed to hardcore manga fans, but the series has been given a Teen rating, which means that this series could potentially have content that is "unsuitable for children under the age of 13!" You've GOT to be kidding me! If THIS series is considering questionable for pre-teens, then I guess we'll see the next Barney special air with a TV-MA rating slapped in the corner, because "Pichi Pichi Pitch" is the most child friendly manga to come to America since Viz released Pokemon several years ago! You could find a conservative Christian who feels that sex is objectionable even in marriage, and even THEY wouldn't find anything to object to in this series! They might object that this book is like bad sugar for the brain, but I don't think any child is going to read this, grown up to be a gang member, and testify in court "I would have grown up to be a respectable citizen if I hadn't read that 'Pichi Pichi Pitch' crap when I was twelve." Not that it really matters what age you are, because regardless how you slice it, "Pichi Pichi Pitch" is pretty fricken boring. It doesn't have anything of real quality that could even make me come close to recommending it. It won't get the dreaded Z grade since the artwork is more boring then terrible, but I think Del Rey's efforts and talent have been wasted on this piece of garbage. Likewise, you money is best spent elsewhere.

- -Review By Kevin T. Rodriguez- -